egberts:

*uses lol and lmfao to make embarrassing and sad truths about myself seem like a joke*

dejasquietplace:

everyone else playing Pokemon go: haha I’ve already caught 34503 pokemon and evolved them!
me, with no driving experience or car, living in a 10 house neighborhood with the only poke spot being a church 20 minutes away in walking distance while the weather outside is on average 100F: this is scrungus the rattata, he is my only friend

nutmeg101:

Date someone you can be fucking weird as hell with who at the end of the day still wants to get naked with you.